Sunday, January 24, 2010

Where's the passion gone?

Think of a time when you felt totally loved.

What convinced you of it?

Was it a certain look you were given? A particular touch? Was it that you were taken out to special restaurants or spoilt with gifts?

Were you told you were loved in words? Did the other person do things to help you? Did they listen to you in a certain way during conversations?

We all have our own 'love strategy' - the blueprint that 'works' for us and convinces us that we are loved.

Early in a relationship, all of the possible 'love strategies' are usually firing off at once. Special looks, frequent touches, hugs, beautiful 'dates', long conversations, gifts, attention and more. It's no wonder we're swept off our feet!

When a relationship deepens and becomes more comfortable, many couples drop the dating pattern and each partner settles into using just a few of these strategies to show their partner they love them. But are they matching the blueprint?

If you're 'touchy feely' and your partner stops hugging you, how do you feel? What if your partner likes hearing you say 'I love you' and you stop doing that? People ask where the passion goes. Sometimes it's as simple as one or both partners having dropped the key actions that connect them deeply with the other person.

Start today

Work out specifically what causes you to feel loved and articulate this to your partner when you can. Find out what convinces your partner that you love them and deliver a lot of that.

No comments:

Post a Comment